If you’ve never played Property Flirt before (and if not, what have you been doing with your surfing time?), welcome to one of the most popular bits of Muddy Stilettos, where I show you round a mega des res in Bucks or Oxon, you guess the price and the winner gets to go on a romantic night out with Kevin McCloud.
You ready to rumble? Here we go,.
Flint House, above, is a gorgeous ex-parsonage in the middle of Penn St village, Bucks, built in 1849 and designed by Benjamin Ferrey, a specialist in the Gothic revival style. Regardez-vous the gorgeous detailing such as a gabled porch, stone mullioned windows with shouldered heads and trefoil arches and quoins (look it up people, I had to).
Don’t know where Penn St is? Think 4 miles to Amersham (so Marylebone 30 minutes or Metropolitan Line); Beaconsfield 4 miles (Marylebone from 25 minutes); High Wycombe 5 miles; Heathrow Airport 20 miles. You’re deliciously commutersville. And with a footpath into Penn Wood almost immediately opposite the house you’re also mainlining the countryside, so add on a little premium in price for that little combo.
Remove your eye from the keyhole, because in we go, fellow nosers.
As you’d expect from a Victorian parsonage, there are open fireplaces, original pine floorboards, shutters, internal doors and high ceilings. For starters there’s a dual aspect drawing room with shutters and open fireplace, a sitting room next door…
.. plus a dining room that features hand-painted walls by the decorative artist John Sutcliffe, an open fireplace and a ‘hidden’ serving hatch to the kitchen.
The kitchen is ‘original 50s’ which I think we can all agree in estate agent speak means ‘due an update’ unless you’re a retro nut like me and want to keep it entirely (hey, don’t judge me).
There’s a small cellar fitted with wine storage, plus a garden room leads through to the heated swimming pool with changing room and shower nad slideing doors onto the garden. Kind of like mine, except I don’t have the swimming pool or changing room. Nor much of a shower to boast about either for that matter.
The house boasts five bedrooms, three bathrooms, and if that still isn’t enough to accommodate your lascivious extended husband-swapping parties, there’s a former coach house and stables that’s now been converted to a four bedroom/two bathroom house. Check out the sitting/dining room below – all 24 ft of it.
The gardens are just over an acre and are part of the National Gardens Scheme so clearly they’re totally schmiko, and there’s a paved terrace around the house, a herb garden, gravel garden, rose hoops, and a pergola, all the better to watch the tennis.
Fancy buying yourself into this life? Yeah me too (*dabbing eyes gently*). But how much will it cost you? No cheating – work out the price you think it’s worth, consult, lay your bets and see how close you get. Then check on where your nearest bank is and start planning your raid.