Bucks &amp; Oxon


<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="1000" height="750" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6390.jpg" alt="Crazy Bear Beaconsfield" class="wp-image-167811" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6390.jpg 1000w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6390-800x600.jpg 800w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6390-400x300.jpg 400w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></figure>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading" id="h-the-location"><strong>THE LOCATION</strong></h2>



<p>Beaconsfield&#8217;s Crazy Bear hotel opened in a 15th-Century coaching inn back in 2008 to much fanfare because, aside from its sister hotel in Stadhampton, there&#8217;s really nothing like it in the area. Well, can you think of another place decked out with gold drape curtains and mustard velvet wallpaper (and that&#8217;s on the ceiling). Fast-forward to &#8217;24 and the party&#8217;s still going strong in this moneyed corner of Middle England, where Porsche-driving millionaires are two a penny.</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="1000" height="750" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6353.jpg" alt="Crazy Bear Beaconsfield" class="wp-image-167813" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6353.jpg 1000w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6353-800x600.jpg 800w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6353-400x300.jpg 400w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></figure>



<p>As befits its glitzy locale (Labour didn&#8217;t get a look-in here in the General Election), The Crazy Bear has a more is more aesthetic. There&#8217;s a Moroccan-themed outdoor pool to lounge around and enough crystal chandeliers, gilt Buddhas and patterned feature walls to make Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen beam with pride. Head to the boutique hotel rooms, spread across 11 nearby properties, and Hugh Hefner would feel at home: the top-end suites have mirrors on the ceiling. I&#8217;m sure there&#8217;d be pink champagne on ice too if you ask nicely &#8211; room service runs all night.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading" id="h-the-vibe">THE VIBE</h2>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="1000" height="750" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6385.jpg" alt="Crazy Bear Beaconsfield" class="wp-image-167815" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6385.jpg 1000w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6385-800x600.jpg 800w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6385-400x300.jpg 400w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></figure>



<p>As discussed, the Crazy Bear is buzzy, brash and dripping with champers and chandeliers. For a quick take: think <em>Footballers Wives</em>&nbsp;meets&nbsp;<em>Made In Chelsea.</em>&nbsp;Given the vibe, I&#8217;d suggest not wearing an M&amp;S cardigan for a night out here (cosy though they are). The Crazy Bear is a land of influencers dressed to impress their gazillion Insta followers. So channel a Kardashian, sling on some leopard print and you&#8217;ll blend in nicely with the Bear&#8217;s animal spirit. It&#8217;s a hedonistic den where lunchtime cocktails roll on &#8217;til late. I&#8217;m sure the Ibiza pool party on August Bank Holiday weekend will be a lively affair.</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="1000" height="665" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/143.jpg" alt="Crazy Bear Beaconsfield cocktails" class="wp-image-167817" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/143.jpg 1000w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/143-800x532.jpg 800w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/143-400x266.jpg 400w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></figure>



<p>The Crazy Bear also does an indulgent line in afternoon teas, or come for an evening meal in one of its two restaurants followed by a jazzy-coloured cocktail back at the bar, which stays open to 1am. Ah yes, the cocktails. There&#8217;s Margaritas, Daiquiris, Coladas, Martinis and Spritzes galore on the drinks menu, plus wine, whisky, cigars &#8211; you name it, I suspect you may need a lie-in the morning after downing bourbon-based Strawberry Bullets and dancing to DJ Brandon Block. No surprise, perhaps, that many guests stay the night in one of the Bear&#8217;s opulently designed bedroom suites. The one we saw had a roll-top bath filled by a tap ingeniously positioned on the ceiling, with a quilted leather headboard and huge wall-mounted TV all ready for, er, romance. Did I mention the hotel is adults only? </p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading" id="h-scoff-amp-quaff">SCOFF &amp; QUAFF</h2>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="1000" height="667" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/6.jpg" alt="Crazy Bear Beaconsfield champagne" class="wp-image-167819" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/6.jpg 1000w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/6-800x534.jpg 800w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/6-400x267.jpg 400w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></figure>



<p>The Crazy Bear&#8217;s drinks menu opens with a quote from Lily Bollinger – so it seemed only fitting to start our ladies’ lunch with a glass of bubbly. (As Ms Bollinger&#8217;s poem in praise of Champers concludes: &#8220;I never touch it, unless I&#8217;m <em>thirsty</em>.&#8221;) So if you hadn&#8217;t already guessed, this chi chi spot gives the liquid lunch a hearty bear hug. In total there are 25 different champagnes on the list (including a £900 bottle of Dom Perignon), but that&#8217;s not including the double-size Magnums available on request. We didn&#8217;t go <em>that</em> large, but it was a hot day and the pool was a great spot for people-watching, so a couple of glasses of Lanson Reserve Brut slipped down rather pleasantly.</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="1000" height="595" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/Food-Summer.jpg" alt="Crazy Bear Moroccan menu" class="wp-image-167821" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/Food-Summer.jpg 1000w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/Food-Summer-800x476.jpg 800w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/Food-Summer-400x238.jpg 400w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></figure>



<p>We were here to try the new lunchtime Moroccan menu however, so duty called (it&#8217;s a tough job) and we kicked off with plates of octopus on a bed of spicy hummus and chorizo, and nori-cured salmon goujons accompanied by lime mayo. Both courses came from the &#8216;Indulge&#8217; section of the menu, as did our main course. We both chose the crispy beef salad: a light summer option given a flavoursome Middle Eastern twist with flaked almonds and chilli.</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="1000" height="750" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6356.jpg" alt="Crazy Bear pool Beaconsfield" class="wp-image-167823" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6356.jpg 1000w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6356-800x600.jpg 800w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6356-400x300.jpg 400w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></figure>



<p>You can sit by the pool and order snacks all day long, and the lunch menu is served from midday until 9pm &#8211; or to 10pm for Moroccan-inspired puddings like orange and wild borage posset, or waffles with orange bloom syrup. For a more formal outing, the Crazy Bear&#8217;s English restaurant serves up contemporary takes on classic dishes (think venison with rhubarb ketchup and honey croutons). The Thai Restaurant a short walk along the road is the spot for perhaps a crispy Gressingham duck salad with coriander, coconut and chilli paste, or shiitake, button and chestnut mushroom satay with arjard cucumber relish and peanut dipping sauce. Decisions, decisions.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading" id="h-out-amp-about">OUT &amp; ABOUT</h2>



<p>Beaconsfield Old Town is very pretty, with rows of Tudor, Queen Anne and Georgian houses to admire/envy, plus plenty of fancy shops and beauty &amp; tweakment salons. So if you&#8217;re staying at The Crazy Bear it&#8217;s worth strolling around and flexing the credit card. The Old Town is mostly&nbsp;restaurants and interiors shops (try Farrow &amp; Ball, Space NK, Whistles and Sweaty Betty for starters, plus indie boutiques <a href="https://www.instagram.com/graceboutiqueuk/?hl=en" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Grace</a>, <a href="https://www.theforgeboutique.com/">The Forge</a>, <a href="https://www.clementsandchurch.co.uk/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Clements &amp; Church</a> and <a href="https://vintageandvogueuk.com/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Vintage &amp; Vogue</a>). The New Town, by the mainline train station, has more shopping and Beaconfield&#8217;s quirkiest attraction, <a href="https://www.bekonscot.co.uk/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Bekonscot</a> model railway village. If you exhaust Beaconsfield&#8217;s many charms, you&#8217;re close to Amersham: another photogenic market town with even <em>more</em> boutique shopping.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading" id="h-the-muddy-verdict">THE MUDDY VERDICT</h2>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="1000" height="750" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6376.jpg" alt="Beaconsfield Crazy Bear" class="wp-image-167825" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6376.jpg 1000w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6376-800x600.jpg 800w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6376-400x300.jpg 400w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></figure>



<p><strong>GOOD FOR:&nbsp;</strong>An antithesis to boutique hotel blandness, this OTT venue with restaurants, terrace and pool (for hotel guests and daytime only) is eccentric and high energy. Head here for girls&#8217; nights out, parties and special occasions (it has two private rooms to hire), or a couple&#8217;s weekend.</p>



<p><strong>NOT FOR:&nbsp;</strong>The hotel is adults-only, so the hedonistic evening scene is not suitable for children. And if you’re looking for Farrow &amp; Ball hues and understated elegance, I suggest you look elsewhere for a more genteel establishment, like a tea room.</p>



<p><strong>££:&nbsp;</strong>Party too hard at the Crazy Bear and the bill could begin to bite. Cocktails £15-£17, starters from £7, mains from £11. Champagne from £14 by the glass and from £75 to £900 a bottle (more for Magnums). Rooms from around £129 per night.</p>



<p><strong>By Harriet Dennys, Editor, Bucks &amp; Oxon</strong></p>



<p><a href="https://crazybeargroup.co.uk/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">The Crazy Bear</a>, Wycombe End, Beaconsfield HP9 1LX</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img decoding="async" loading="lazy" width="1000" height="750" src="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6373.jpg" alt="Crazy Bear private room" class="wp-image-167827" srcset="https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6373.jpg 1000w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6373-800x600.jpg 800w, https://dev.muddystilettos.co.uk/bucksoxon/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2024/08/IMG_6373-400x300.jpg 400w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></figure>


Review: The Crazy Bear, Beaconsfield

You may also like